where have i been all my life?

i found a really nifty website the good men project
by way of one of my blogger reads that posted about this article, "confronting life"

while at this site i found writing on how we grieve in the facebook age.. the memorialization process fb actually has to shut down activity "from" the decedent (new word for me) but also allow people to share their memories and talk to them on their wall forever. and how it might interfere with closure..

AND this article on what to look for when you buy a car, which has made me so sick i may never get one. THOUSANDS of dollars. i balk at a ten dollar cover. which i havent seen in a while. cuz i just dont go out anymore.

is this any way to live?

cuz i am alive

unlike the two young men in my life recently memorialized on fb (one's anniversary just passed before my other fella passed away) and all the death my co-workers are experiencing, i'm alive

should i be clutching money for a rainy day? should i pay off my loan? should i buy a car? should i hoard it all just so i can recount it every bank statement and roll around in the digital dollar signs in my imagination? prolly not that last one

i'll prolly hold onto it
im my daddy's daughter

besides, its my cottage cheese

movin in with will in two months and i aint got no job yet!
first thing i need to do for hermit's sake is find a dance studio that performs every once in a while, huggy people outside of will's family (i can always get a hug there, but the point is for me to be my own person and have my own people in a place that isnt mine), and belly-laugh people (i had some good laughs with people i barely know at the end of a frustrating day at the dance studio where i had not one student show up, and i left feeling infinitely better)
maybe a car
we'll see how the max does me.
we'll see how the weather does me.
how am i gonna move?
indecision 2010

and who to vote for? everyone's so haterrific
and where's my voter card? i've lived away and done absentee the past 6 years!
ugh augusta
oh augusta

i was really starting to like you